I bitch a lot about the topic of starting over

Its 4:13 am and I've been home from tour for almost 3 weeks. It was one wild ride and I am completely assured that I came out a new woman..

Today marks June 1st, 2008
I am located in Sunny California. .
HOME I call it. .
The air has been foul lately
not reminding me of the crisp ocean breeze.
Classic reruns and over done piano keys.
Its a brand new day
A different life.

Today marks the day where I guess I have to get healthy. I wonder if it will work. Im so damn lazy, its time to learn to push myself I guess. I stubbed my toes on the cylinder block holding my bed together. . let me tell you NOT CUTE. . My poor little toes are swollen as hell and I cant do a thing about it.

BUMMER. .


summer relaxation is an underrated activity.
Team Work gets you nowhere

Familiar Faces In Weird Places

The big 50 you say?

Fuck yes. . NEW ORLEANS . .

Yesterday was by far the greatest FUCK YOU show ever. . it all started out with us stuck in Alabama for 7 hours . .

You see things like to fly out at me from underneath semi trucks. . This time it was a cylinder block . . took out our oil pan . . To be honest, thank god AAA exists because it took 2 tow trucks to drive us 200 miles (more actually) from Nashville to Birmingham alabama . . FOR FREE .. . yet when we arrived to birmingham alabama FIRESTONE a problem that was suppose to only take 3 hours ended up taking 7 and cost us well over 445 dollars to repair . . .

We got on the road around 4 o clock . . we had about a 4 hour drive ahead of us . . yes. . we were not gonna make it . . Keep in mind this show was MCR's best kept secret show at the smallest venue on the tour (House Of Blues - NO) we weren't going to miss my 50th show that I didn't pay for thanks to the powers of Mr. Furry Piggy back giver . . lol . as Lj calls him . .

We arrived at the show 45 min late and caught the ending which began with Prison being the first song we came in to . .. We got through the crowd as easy as drinking a coke . . the crowd was deffinetly having it . . Gerard saw us coming in and pointed to the "bunch of hooligans moving the statues" . . . The show was amazing and I got my 50th show shout out which consisted of "I'd like to thank the fans who have been at the shows EVERY NIGHT you know who you are" . . Its nice to be noticed but not a necessity . .

After the super small show we headed out into the world. We retrieved the camera because in New Orleans we play tourist . . We ran into Gerard and Mehdi where we continued to share our story of the van taking a shit in the middle of nowhere . . . In search for the famous Bourbon street . .Gerard gave us directions and we were on our way . . but not before he gave us a high five and told us to go get waisted . .

Let me tell you something about Bourbon Street. . HOLY SHIT . . although I cannot get "waisted" as Gerard insisted . . I could see the half naked women parading around the streets along with their drunk boyfriends . . it was bliss. . As we made our entrance onto Bourbon street a particular midgit passed us by . . Lj describes it as seeing jesus therefore she couldn't react as fast. . . when she gathered her senses she managed to call out the midgits name. . "BEN!" he turned and replied " ohhh! haha its you!" he stopped to greet the rest of us . . and we talked for awile . . We talked about the next cd. . which he brought up himself by mentioning he really wants to play us one of the 4 new songs they've been working on . . he's been thinking about it for awile but he can't because the internet and people who record and fuck up songs these days . . he also mentioned the album wouldn't be out till the latest next year . . . We got a million thank yous for rocking out on the barricade for them every night . . he commented that we make the band feel normal . . and not like their playing to a bunch of statues . . I mentioned that I wanted to hear Standing in the rain again .. then jill through in " she actually wants to hear worker bees" . . with that said a smile spread across Ben's face and he screamed to Ian " WE HAVE A REQUEST TO PLAY WORKER BEE'S" . . a smile spread across Ian's face as if smiling was a disease and he replied "Oh my GOD. . we havnt played that in soooooooo long" . . so maybe. tonight. Benjamin Kowalewicz will make my night. . And to end the conversation on a funny note he mentioned that tonights so is dubbed the weird show and that its only an hour and a half away (meaning nothing bad can happen) and we better drive safe . .

There's this store on Bourbon Street called Jazz Funeral . . I believe . . its honest to god got all the awesome shit . . I bought 60 bucks worth of shit and my 30 dollar skeleton guitarists head broke off in the car . . ugh . . sometimes I hate tour for the purpose of shit breaking . .

Now we are in Baton Rouge . . waiting for Xfest . . waiting for the GL to become available. . worlds most annoying kids in front of me . . 12 yearolds . . fuck this . .

Baton Rouge really has nothing good to it. . yes, better than NO which was ghetto as fuck and annoyed the hell out of me . . BR is just humid and the kids smell bad . . Doors open at 3 I believe. .

Well for now . . . that's it. . the fucking shopping we did at the mall earlier was funny as hell . . but no more of that wants shit . . its all about the needs. .

talk to u late

Jewlie

Detroit ROCK city!

on this glorious cold spring morning in Detroit ROCK city, Michigan we wake up to the need to PISS OUR PANTS . . after walking up and down this wonderful block North, South, East and West we discover a church lurking in the distance . . we walk up its heavenly steps with the tune of voices of violence in our heads . . and man did we look hung over . . . they guided us into a mass where we sat for a total of one minuet staring blankely at the odd figures in the front dressed in white robes and holy crosses ( go religion !) . . . suddenly the realization that kati and I couldn't understand a damn thing this man was preaching we decided to continue on with our journey . . to the restroom . We found it . . in the basement . . possibly the BEST Piss of our lives . . THANK U JESUS!



ps: we almost crossed the Canadian border yesterday . . pretty intense how close we really are . .

Detroit must hate WAMU

Well I'm here reporting from the famous DETROIT ROCK CITY . . its a huge eh of a city . . no offence to Vicki and my NOGH boys . . but I REALLY hate your home town . . You want dirty? come to Detroit, I guess . . oh and to set the fire a blaze . . they have no WAMU . .

Yesterday or well for the past 2 1/2 days we were stationed in Chicago . . Like Detroit I didn't really like Chicago . . Don't get me wrong the people were shockingly NICE AS HAIL . . . The venue was next to a train station and we found ourselves screaming over its roaring screeches more than we would have like to . .

Chicago-ians are amazing with their pride and representation of their city . . I swear the entire city was decked down in Cubs uniforms and signs that said CUBS FAN? welcome! . . . I'm sure the reason was an early game . . but even in LA I've never seen so many people wearing one uniform .. . Also on my journey into the city I stopped by a store I've wanted to visit FOREVER (well since its opening) . . . the prime reason TECHNICALLY for ever going to Chicago . . . THE CLANDESTINE STORE . . and oh em gee . . is it tiny. . I walk in there trying to go through my memory if there would be more than one store just thinking no no this is it . . The man working (who I feel really bad for not asking his name, but we shall call him) Freddie asked if I needed any assistance . . This is when the fan girl EXPLODED . . I basically ran through everything I knew about the store with him . . Naturally I asked where the fitting room doors were he walked me in and let me take as many pictures as I wanted . . The famous and my favorite door that says "Ill show you mine if you show me yours" is seriously small as HAIL . . and the dressing room . . is tiny . . . I had to bend in all sorts of directions just to get a good pic . . and get this . . . The damn store has a barber shop in the back which according to the hot/sexy barber is only open mostly fridays-sundays . .. and there is also a quote above on the wall that says something like "This Machine Kills Fashion" . . lord . . I was in heaven . . The fact that Freddie was so effing nice about the whole situation . . knew I was a fan girl for the store itself was just amazing . . I showed off my clan bat proudly . . I was insanely sane . . ha ha . . OH and I saw the new jacket .. . I WANT IT SOOOOOOOOOO BAD . .

The shows out here are so so . . A bunch of cry babies like the Colorado shows . . Both nights the let in was so sketchy that the group was SEPERATED both nights . . but it was ok . . love for Billy Talent on both sides of the barricade. . right.

I'd like to give a shout out to Alex . . Alex is Billy Talent's merch man and he's the nicest man on the merch scene. . He's my new BFF from the canada side ( tho I'm almost certain he's either Irish or Scottish) . . . he gives me breaks when I make him a sale . . amazing . . . oh . . . and I bought another DVD courtesy of Mr. Alex's opinon and my "employee/ a regular" discount . . and OH EM GEE is it just an amazing dvd at that . . . if u thought the Try Honesty dvd was hilarious . . try the SCANDALOUS TRAVELERS dvd . . packed with all sorts of Ian and Ben fun . . gah . . I love my boys in Billy Talent . .

oh and a little PS about one of the girls last night . . we were all running to the barricade . . I was hauling ass . . luckily it was down hill so it was easy . . and I hauled ass. . a little girl beat me . . I'm like . .shit . . as soon as she hit the barricade she collapsed. . I was like uhhhhh did u hit your head? she literally just fell. . I made her get up and she walked out . . . Hello Barricade . .

I guess that is all . . Chicago you were great . . minus the fact you ate my debit card and the fact I hate you . . . but I may come back one day. . eh . . what em I saying . . ill be back


till next time kids!
take care

reporting from this godamn airport

Part one of 3 is now over . .

Im worlds WORST blogger when it comes to this shit and I really em sorry for that I just cant sit here everyday and write. . you know. . but I did happen to save some bulletins that I posted from the trip. . .

COPY AND PASTE!

SAN FRANCISCO SHOW


SURRENDER

Every word every thought every sound . . . .

San Fran will never let you down when it comes to Gnarly fat women with huge breast tats and a godamn chunk of metal in their HXC I'M SO METAL eye brow . . . and of course the signature bums that are gnarly as fuck . . count san fran in for that fucking experience . . .

I have to really fucking pee right now . .by the fucking way . . A man with a tribal tattoo under his lip asked me who was playing tonight . . . I shrugged and laughed. .

I swear tonights show better be fucking worth it . . . I'm talkn no skipping I'M NOT OK . . no Bob Dylan cover that gerard 1. doesn't know and 2. They can't play it . . . and deff no fan girling and what not. .

Its not that I don't want to EVER meet Ben from Billy Talent its just that I'd rather him freak out everytime I pass him and never say Hi . . first rockstar to get butt hurt if you didn't mention you know who the fuck he is



update over

GOOD MORNING SAN FRANCISCO

I have to fucking pee


BAMBOOZLE DAY 1

Bamboozle Day one and I feel like SHIT! . . .


I love the way my body feels after going through so much torture and bad eating habits and shitty sleeping schedules. . . .


I love it.


Im awake sure. Yes. . but Im stressed as fuck. I seem to have lost a VERY important key to my future . ha ha ha. . so to speak.



My life is funny! Im going to be crying about it in about 3 hours .



<3 JEwlie

BAMBOOZLE DAY 2

OUCH!




Today is my off day :( . . . well . . tomorrow is too! since I dont have a ride to We The Kings in La Jolla. . . that sucks too! cuz I could have went to TWO mcr shows. . but NOOOOOOOOO . . ugh.


WHATEVS

This weekend was AMAZING! I got to meet so many of my friends that I hardly ever get to see! Especially SUZI who might just be my new best friend. . thanks for taking care of me! ha hah a. . .


Chilling with Matt Manning for half n hour was probably the best part. . May not sound like much for most of you. . but FFTL is one of my favorite bands in the FUCKING WORLD! and chilling with his drunk ass was like a fat kid in a candy shop . . if ya catch my drift. . He's just so fucking funny and so fucking chill. . . to stand there and chat it up with me, rhi and vienna. . good lord. . Better than an acid trip.


Id also say finally chilling it out with Vienna and Rhi!!! their the 2 most wonderful women in the world. . So full of life and dedication! and they kept my bored ass occupied both days . . . MAJOR THANKS to them for coming to hoe town . .
ha ha

I guess I have to add the CHILLAGE with my boys from Drive By aswell. . awkward moments. . but we got over them. . their signing was amazing . . so many kids showed up . . i was proud as fuck. . kinda like a mother is proud when her kid falls and scraps his knees for the first time. .


shit. . so much . .


Billy Talent. . HOLY HOE! . . lord. . Im seriously . . IN LOVE with that band. . like . . you know how when you are in the middle of a pit for your favorite band. . and your just fucking ROCKING out. . like a fuckn douche. . yea. .thats how I feel when I see Billy Talent. . . Ben Kowalewicz fuckn amazes my ass . . his overall performance blows my fucking mind. . Ian, Jon and Aaron are just as mind boggling as the fuckn frontman. . and none the less . . the fucking canadian flag joined us in the pit. . for once. . i was actually fucking glad to see its ever so wonderful RED and WHITE colors. . .


Lame. . yes. . but tell me one more time that Matt Cortez does not love me. . .THANK YOU CORTEZ FOR THE SET LIST! . . ha ha . . im going to start passing them out. . i have way to many from that man.



Overall this entire week has been amazing. . I feel so alive and right now im hyper as hell because im not used to just sitting here . . . sitting here is new for me. . .


my we the kings shirt got stretched out! . .
ha ha ha

jesus.

> PORTLAND

That Portland . . NO OFFENSE is a bunch of babies. .


I dont know how much bitching I got today from kids who just cant take the fact that Im tall . . . or the fact that I could care less if you are "dying" . . . The only kid I care about is the one next to me. . I dont care if you are thirsty or if you cant see. . If the kid next to me cant see. . Ill make room for her. if she's thirsty (although how can she with the over amounts of BILLY TALENT water we received) I will get her water. . So thanks for the elbows Portland. . Thanks for the gum and thanks for the pulling of the hair. . you guys earned the most DOUCHE BAG crowd of the tour THUS FAR. ..

shame shame. .


other than that. . I think today was effing amazing. . or well yesterday at this point. . partying it up in a booth. . amazing. . . I think that pizza I had was seriously the best pizza in the world. . ha ha . .


Today was a good day.


and IM ONTO YOU CORTEZ! . .. thanks for the 5th setlist of the godamn tour . .




Chicago. . Billy Talent needs to play the THE EX . . i miss that song.

ugh


<3 Jewlie





Oh and BTW HAPPY BIRTHDAY GERARD WAY!!!!! you are now 31. you old BASTARD SON. .



I liked today. . tbh. . we chilled with some gnarly people in a booth and ate some amazing pizza . . bought a diet coke for someone special and got laughed at by the boys from Billy Talent. . Im sitting in the airport right now about to go home. . its 6:18am . . . I figured I was so tired that I would knock out in the airport lobby room. . but. . no .. . Im here buying Buffalo tickets for BT's headliner and Detroit MCR tickets. .

A lot of people mistaken the fact that i MUST be loaded. . but if you should know I have less than 2 grand in my checking account .. havnt paid my cellphone bill or done my taxes . . so you tell me .. em i loaded? no. . im just spending all my money on something that is actually important to me .. I figure when MCR goes on their hiatus. . I'll catch up on life. . and save up for the next godamn tour. . Im not going to see any bands for awile. . unless their on our label and I can get in for free. . .

SORRY PANIC! i might not go to you. (OH MY GOD!!! DID SHE JUS SAY THAT?!?!?)

ps: IM ONTO YOU CORTEZ!!! somethings up!! and Im going to find out!! ha ha jk jk

<3 Jewlie

surrender every word every thought every sound

i wrote about an ESSAY long description of how tours been. . sooo. . im not writing it again. .

here's the so far pics of what ive takn. . im lazy. . so its not much.

HOOVER DAMN!

I know I know its spelled dam. . but you know what. . I hate that place. . but TRANSFORMERS YO! . . i dont understand its importance and why we have to spend our sweet time driving through an "alien" landing site (im aware it is not an alien site) covered in concrete holding back water and forbidding it from entering the colorado river. . just let the water go! FLOOD THE WORLD!



Like i HONESTLY do not understand why you must park your car to capture this picture. . . its SUB ZERO TEMPERATURE OUTSIDE . . . worst. idea. EVER





im pretty sure the BEST MEMORIES come from VEGAS. . . cuz its VEGAS BABY. . .from the embarrassment of falling on my ass in front of the tour crush to the running into mothers at starbucks. . Vegas held the record for 48 hours of PURE awkwardness. . . by the way I beat the shit out of a cup trying to get the straw through the hole in front of gods creation. . he was amazed at my ability and decided singing surrender to me was a MUST.

anyways. .

to get the jist of what brought happy memories. . i bring you MICK JAGGER IN THE PISSER! what lady wouldnt want to see Mick Jagger while she's taking a piss. . its just something that every little girl dreams of.



the hard rock has some amazing rooms aswell. . We had the privilege of Bob Dylan being the prime fan of our promiscuous activities which included late night bar hopping and running down halls buzzed as fuck trying to reach an important wrist band gathering down stairs. . He also had the honor of watching me fall off my bed and trap a cockroach in a cup. . good times good times. .




Im not sure if Id ever take back the past 4 days . . . .
Now onto the next .


LATE!

stay sexy!

Wreck Your Life

I have just a couple issues I need to address that bug me. . and choosing that i vent on the internet more than the average person would expect from me. . Im doing it. . and you cant stop me! ha ha ha. .

I'd like to think last night was both the BEST and WORST night of my life . Its a twofer . . is that how they spell it? TWOFER! yea. . sure. .anyways. . Last night I saw Panic! At The Disco for the first time since December of 2006. It just had to be Kimmel, right ha ha. Anyways. My joy for seeing those boys showed in the tapes of statues as Irene, Corrine and I danced our little asses off. . We created dance moves that made television and apparently little Ryan smile ( i wanted to rhyme that but it didnt work out). . . Anyways. So we scared Ryan a couple times but you have to admit seeing the light shine in Brendon's face due to 3 little girls screaming " FUCKING SLUT!" was the best present you can give to your baby. Tho in the past I have called Panic! my babies because i have seen them grow as a band they are now my toddler. . . they are SO GROWN UP NOW! . . brings tears to my eyes. . tbh.

I actually refuse to comment on what else happened last night because it will upset me more than I really should be at the moment. Lets just say friends need to get off jonas brothers NUTS and take care of other friends. . oh and. . my car . . ha ha. . needs to be repaired. .ONCE AGAIN!. gosh. . i feel so bad for my car. . its had the body work done on it 3 times already. . so sad.

Another issue i need to address is a friend who shall not be named. . but she has a problem and needs help .. . . maybe some help on how to be a friend. . i dont know. . but leaving another friend out in the cold . is not the business. . so all i have to say to her is GROW THE FUCK UP! and stop looking just as CRAZY as the 12 year old fans that are attracted to those shits. .

PEACE OUT! NOOKAS!


Tomorrow I LEAVE!

Give It A Name

GENTLE FINGERS FOR THE CONSTANT BELIEVERS

i sit in this empty lobby full of body less souls
its packed in here like a sardine can
oh what a salty soul

Her breath is like silver
Her eyes are like gold
but once they go cold
she will roam with no home

The receptionist will check her messages
sneeze into a tissue
hold the phone to her ear
as she says
Hello Misses . .


Can i help you with something?
he will ask her in desperation
Oh no .. I am meeting someone
she replies with no interest

The room will go quiet
distant coughs and vibrating phones
foot steps of thunder
but i dont hear a sound

they take me in the back
a secret I shall never reveal
I remember his face
so subtle and still
he cheeked out a smile
i refused to acknowledge
his name was plastered
on his handsome yet disciplined face
i loved as a child

I sit here alone
the bodies are dead
as they wait for their loved ones
alone and scared to death
be calm she screams
the surgery went fine
shes going to get her own room
doped on vicadin , novacane and lies

She will go home
She will go home
She will go home
red lights flash
home.

Be sure to check back from time to time these next couple of weeks. . I know I never keep my word in writing on tour. . but thats because I can never get internet service. . . but i do write random things . . so just check in leave me a few comments. . and maybe I'll send you a picture of the band you most likely love. .

ha ha

<3 Jewlie

I am sorry. . but can you just step back a bit?

I think I find clarity in blogging to be honest. I dont expect a huge blog following or anyone to read any of what I have to say. A lot of these blogs are for me to vent. So I do just that. I vent. Thank god for blogs. You vent. Its perfect.

For the past few weeks now I have suffered from a lack of will to sleep. I blame the fact that my day consists of nothing but picking up the baby and going to shows. What a life. Even my job involves me going to a show. Im not complaining, dont get me wrong, i love my effing life. I just need to break this repetitive lifestyle I have set up for myself. Onto a lighter subject.

I read a little thing today from a fellow "fan" who understands about how everyone thinks its hip (hip as AA hoodies) to say the words " IM WITH THE BAND." Its not that it bugs me a lot because half the time I hear this I dont think anything of it. Yet sometimes when you drag in bands that I actually know, I sit there and laugh, sometimes even in your face. I learned the hard way not to talk to people about who I know because YES in your eyes I am still a fan. In fact in my own eyes, yes I am a fan. Sometimes I get put on guest list sometimes I don't, either way I will be as close as I possibly can so i can get the full on feel of the show. I have done the whole side stage deal. Its not for me. Yet i dont think its smart for anyone who knows a band or "claims" to know a band to talk about it like its just the thing to do . Sure be proud of your band, but dont be 13 and screaming at the top of your lungs "OH MY GOD SHAWN HARRIS I WANT TO FUCK YOU IN THE *beep*" you know what I mean? SO basically what Im trying to get at is just because Pete Wentz talks to you for a split second, doesnt mean he's your best friend. Just because Gerard Way pointed toward your direction (probably not even AT you) doesnt mean he wants you to tell half the godamn fan club you and him are besties and going for sundays on tuesday at the Mc Donalds across the street from YOUR venue. . Chances are 1. He doesn't know you aside from you being a fan 2. He doesn't know you period. . . so drop the lame I want to be considered cool act. . ITS MUSIC not a popularity contest. We go to shows to escape these damn facades of life not to re create them in a different, less hypocritical setting. We are suppose to be all about the music, all about the fun and high of the game. . Thats just it . its all a game. Another popularity contest of who can go to the most shows and get the most bands to remember their face. Some of us are SO high school while others act like their in high school . . . Act your age kids . . and that doesnt involve anything i previously quoted. Grow up. Like Panic! at the disco.

Another thing I and bands cant stand is the constant need to confess this baby drama. Its a little annoying to be in the pit of one of your favorite bands and then hear a screech from a far screaming " GABRIEL! I WANT YOUR BABIES! I LOOOOOVVVEE YOU!" Now thats both funny and disturbing. Why would you want Gabe Saporta's fur children? thats just down right dumb. The man doesnt know you nor does he believe your Jane Fonda knock off in bright neon green tights with your prepubescent body is the shit. . . so drop the jane fonda shit girls. . its not fitting. . your era.

Anyways . . On with it right. Tomorrow Imma go see This Is Hell .. Check em out will ya? their awesome. . Put on a damn good show.

myspace.com/thisishell ( i believe that is the myspace)

This blog is going to be put up to a great test in March. . . Ive got a lot of drama filled shows coming and I get to see my BFF on the 11th. . I cant wait. . I miss him. . . tho i just spend an entire week with his ass



STAY SEXY

A really bad breakup can make you love again

I pretty much spent the better part of the evening binging on old Internet sites and un funny videos trying to cope what was ment to be. 

John Mayer's music is good therapy . He's gotten me through some pretty bad break ups, rejection, fights all that jazz that occured in my ever so famous past. I guess I have this theory that he's got to be one of the greatest lovers out there to come up with this shit. So whenever I feel shitty about a guy I just pop in some godamn John Mayer and think about the sex, love and turmoil within that voice. That voice alone, godamn. Yet I have done my research through the past years and have found it relatively funny that the man who I perceive as the "Perfect" man is actually a douche bag who loves to many godamn women and cant sit still. Who wouldn't ? Yer fucking JOHN MAYER for christ sake, Id be a fucking douche bag as well.  Anyways. This persona I built up in my head pops up in every man I have tried to pursue and more and more I start to think that I am trying to find this man . . this fucking persona here that I have made up in my head. Alot of times they either have really curly fucking hair, eyebrows like a maniac or look just as raunchy as a Mr. Pj. This man he has been popping up recently. I have had 3 encounters with him and I die each and everytime. I guess I blame John Mayer for making me think that a fantasy character that I made up in my head who plays Your Body Is A Wonderland acoustic for me in sheets of white with nothing but his voice and guitar is real. Fuck it, he's real. He's going to play me that godamn song one day. As i sit there looking at him with love struck eyes as he strums his guitar and i study his fingers. Hes going to be wrapped in my sheets with love in his voice. One day. One day. You will stop hurting me, just sing the fucking song.

 

Hospitals just seem so cold

Sick and in bed is not this families motto. Nor is bitching about being sick. So when I saw tears pouring down my mothers face, i knew something was wrong. Emergency rooms are serious ridic shit. . . Im fortunate to not be at the UCLA hospital .  . because there I have seen people with arms hanging off and faces shattered. Instead we are at Torrance Memorial nice little rich hospital with screaming children and sick lungs. . NO BLOOD IN SIGHT . . so I am content at the moment. . My mother is in pain . . some serious fucking pain. The day I came home I wondered why she wasn't at the door to greet me. I found her in the bathroom bawling her eyes out into the shirt of my younger sister. I lifted her off the bath tub and carried her into bed. I figured she got food poisoning so I let her be. That was a Tuesday, by that sunday she was fine. Tonight she came home from work crying. In pain like she was before. I had just woken up from my four hour nap that nearly killed me. She asked if I could take her to the hospital, I agreed. So im here now. . I have been to 2 of these damn hospitals tonight. I hate hospitals really, but I am here. Taking her shit because she likes to yell  at me. Ha ha get better kid. 

I guess after you get off one tour you should jump on another. . My next long term being away trip will be for the band that started it all My Chemical Romance. Hitting up AZ, NV, OR and California dates. . probably be gone 2 weeks with all the shows I have to squeeze in . . We The Kings' Long Hair Dont Care tour aswell with muh man PJ Bond. The things you do for a godamn good time. . I should be emitted into an institution.

Lord going home sounds so good right now. . . I just want to lay in my little purple futon with my little white and black dog and just drift away till im forced to awaken . . . im tired as fuckn HELL. 

 

RUN BABY RUN

Its gotta be maybe day 5 as of yet. . I believe. . and I honestly have to say the So Cal shows are the worst. I love this city more than the fuzzies on your dirty floor but I do have to agree SO CAL is a mother fuckn bitch. 

On the 13th I asked 2 boys to be my Valentine. It was some awesome shit. Naturally I asked Hunter and naturally he agreed. I was Juliet. It was ok. He said he loved me. So i was satisfied. Then there was my second Valentine who led me on to a DENY but after a long pause and a smile he agreed he would be mine on valentines.  Drew, Hunters brother (yes. I asked them both. ) He is one FREAKY dude who intimidates the fuck out of me. He held my hand and all I could do was stutter. I think I was knocked head over heels over him. Sad, but true. 

CHECK YES JULIET!!

HUNTER

RUN BABY RUN

DREW

The world is filled with to many really really ridiculously good looking dudes. 

Then there was on Valetines day that my secret Valentine popped up with a present for me. No, sadly Hunter and I decided we were to broke to buy each other anything. Sadly, Drew and I were to shy to say anything about anything to eachother. . but one SECRET Valentine decided to just plain out give me a gift. From a Stage. His name is Gabe Saporta and he got me a plastic snake. Smiles are always nice. 

I had a REALLY good week so far. . cept for the stunt Hansel and Gabe pulled last night. . but Travis Clark from We the kings of course fixed my anger and turned it into a smile. I am seriously starting to love we the kings. . 

TIZZYDALE

STAY SEXY 

We Are Not Myths. I promise.

THIS BLOG WAS ORIGINALLY WRITTEN ON FEB 13TH 2008

We met the 2 most oddest, down, ridic fans in the world yesterday. When you think of oddest you think of the many girls who think its "cool" to wear tights with really short shorts in absurd colors that proceed to think it will turn on the extremely "attractive" lead singer and he suddenly will dig your 12 year old under developed body. When you think of down you may think of someone who came to the show during finals week and doesnt give a rats ass he or she may fail and have to drop out of college. Then when  ridic comes to mind you think of the many fans who have tried to "persuade" the band into letting you play suck face and use the tool that would allow them the option of harshly pulling your scene zebra hair our of your effing skull. . Those on their own are Odd, Down and Ridiculous, but have you ever thought to put all three labels together? They come in the form of 2 girls. One from Cleveland (go figure) and the other from Boston (mass?) on a journey across America all for the band that makes you dance your little ass off. . . white. .  Shit, I thought we were odd, down and ridic. We got beat by a mother fucking LONG SHOT. Some fans. I thought they were just some urban legend we only hear about on the interwebz.

 

Day 2 of Cobra tour has sent me with a little bit of mixed emotions. Dont get me wrong, I love this band more than the ridiculous dance moves Gabe calls white but sometimes its just a little to hard to share. Sharing is caring? Who ever came up with that concept should be shot. Sharing is not caring in this case. We have built our selves to become elitist, selfish little turds from LA. What can I say? We have been spoiled. Yesterday talking to Suarez made me realize that its been way to long since an actual conversation and in Gabe's words "ITS BEEN LIKE A YEAR SINCE WE'VE ACTUALLY TALKED!" Sadly it has and that year has gone by way to fast. From bugging the hell out of Mr. Saporta for a headliner we NOW dont want to watching his straightened hair on MTV the year has gone by way to fast. I think being there since the beginning makes the situation 10x harder. From being the one of the only 5 kids in the crowd for the opener of all openers shaking our asses off is mad impressive. I mean come on. Openers of ALL openers. I will never forget those days when you spoke the words " Cobra Starship" the word associated would be "that snakes on a plane song?" . . . . NO . that G-A-B-E gonna get you high. Pure joy.

 

Drama. Follows us everywhere. You sign the contract to drama once you decide to beat out a certain crowd. Your labeled. Forever Hated. Happens. I was thrown into drama for something I had no control over. Lucky? I guess. Its something that happens. Dont let them forget. I guess it will follow us for as long as we love the bands associated with the drama. For as long as we love music I take it. Its more of a gift then a burden. To be hated means your not invisible. Your out of the crowd of normal faces and into the crowd where its your first name or nothing. Your name becomes a fad. Your past becomes made up. Your memories switched around by what they say about you. The snickers behind closed doors. The mocking behind your back. It becomes your life. Its a life you are forced to accept and Im fine with it.

 

Thats all for now. For those who are coming to future dates. This tour is a really really ridiculously good looking tour. Little PJ and sexy John Mayer made my life. . Their in a band called FIRECROTCH aka We The Kings. Love em.

 

Theres also a BUSTED John Mayer. THe world is surrounded by John Mayers.

 

 

SEXY

 

 

 

Off to a HORRIDIBLE start

This day has been so bad that I came up with a NEW word to describe its horrible/horrid events leading to this very instance of me sitting here listening to Kanye West trying to vividly plan out my plan. Oh .  right. . the new word is Horridible. . its a great word. SPREAD IT like rabies. 

Beginning the trip 4 days earlier we have a certain someone drop out of our tour making it 10x harder for us BROKE ASS NIGGAS to pay for the rest. Yet the ones who stuck by the plans have decided whatev ya know. Tour of the century. Not really. But you know we wont go there. 

Being I just have to be the only one with a car and the knowledge to drive in my entire friend circle I am the one who has to put 1. MY CAR 2. OUR LIVES and 3. MY SANITY on the line to drive asses across the godamn west coast. Least they can do is call a nigga up so we can leave EARLY and not at fucking midnight. But we wont go there. 

When I was younger they told me a story of a troll that took your stuff if you didnt clean your room. NOW heres the story: I remember VIVIDLY that i stuck my vest in my dresser for future use. I go to look in my dresser. Is it there? Of course not. Being the same size as your brother often has the little shit stealing your stuff, but this is a green vest from AA and I HIGHLY doubt that he stole my vest. . So the troll must be true . . or we have a theft in the house . . fuck it. We wont go there 

To wrap this up. Ive been stressed out all week with people dropping out and bitches not making up there mind with weather they want to go or not . . Its not my fault people second think shit just days, hours, min before we are to leave on a road trip that will mos def make us Broke ASS niggas. . but why cant they get their shit together and get online and say. YO what up. . 

Im tired of Being left to hang.

but we wont go there.

PEACE

check out : myspace.com/yeahbutididntkissher

and shake it like a snow globe!

Sometimes we have to just SMILE

The following is going to be a list in pictures of things that make me smile. Because. Sometimes. we just have to smile. Just a little bit. 

Deff something to smile about. 

Boyfriend on the left there. K thnx.

 

Oh hai there Ryan Ross and Brendon Urinal. . Hows it goin. . havnt seen you in a LONG TIME.

I was known as DEE coolest chick on DEE planet for dat belt there. The Jacket was a WHITE Panic! Jacket I puked on because I decided to go to SIX FLAGS while I was recovering from stomach flu and lets just say. . DIDNT WORK OUT . . and that tattoo. . is pretty gangster. 

this picture ALONE is all sorts of amazing . . forgot I had it .. in fact didnt even know it existed

Lots of stories with the girls detailed onto this envelope

Because he puts a smile on my face even tho he says I make him sad. .  .

The fact I dont remember this day .. AT ALL . . buts its nice to see us all throwing up signs and i have no IDEA what they stand for . . 

OLD DAYZ

His name is fonso. . and I miss him alot. 

Because living at Disneyland makes our heads spin and hearts swim

It hurts waking up to this every morning. . . But i wouldnt trade the beach in for any shore 

HOME<3

These city lights keep the blood in my veins pumping

All born on my bed  while i was away traveling the west coast.   .  . How beautiful life really is. 

The reason behind it all

The sidekick through life. . The wing man through the travels. . I owe my ADVENTURES to a car named box and his many fights to stay alive. . . I LOVE THIS CAR more than cheese pizza

Knowing my baby pulled through a huge accident and is still going on down the road of life as good as new. . . theres reasons i love my car . . and this accident was one of them. . 

Point Blank.

oh but it is. . .

I bought a DODGE RAM and ran her over  .. . . everyone saw it coming

Because life was about RAVER goggles an MCR beanie , fro and not a worry in our minds. .

Friends till the end. 

Riding in cars with BOYS <3

Just so happens. .  I WANNA GO FASTER!!!!!!

Helps to know. . Theres more to life than a really bad mullet. 

Pictures take his soul. . . or so he says. 

YA HERD

Being there since the beginning

2 of my FAVORITE possesions in the world . . . THE BOX and his BIKE

All VERY drunk . . . and trying to invite ourselves to parties hosted by Paris Hilton. . that was an interesting night. . . Suarez and I BONDED

Yes. . . there was a time when i LOVED Paramore. Before the Parrot was born. 

Its my day job that makes me happy 

THE TOUR OF LIFE and im loving every minute of it. 

Spring 2008

With Spring being a VERY BUSY time for me. . 

I have decided to take ALL OF MY CLASSES online

thats 3 classes ladies and gents of the INTERWEBZ 

the 4th is an art class i plan to drop

im in it for the health insurance. . . 

Econ2

English 101

Buis2

Im really worried about Econ2

but bleh. . hopefully i can pull it off

My Proper Goodbye

My original post was a little far fetch. It was me trying to get over something that was going on in my life that happened to tie with what I thought happened to Heath. Im not sure if anyone will ever REALLY know what happened but the point is the man it is at rest now. 

So all my prayers go out to Michelle, Matilda and the Ledger family 

Rest In Peace 

They expect more from me than I can give them

Em I really who they think I am?

Em I really that important piece of vital information?

That last glitch in the system?

I really wish I wasn't asked of so much

proving myself to the system

just to see a better tomorrow

for who?

for me?

nah. . A better tomorrow for me

would be the end to slavery

the end to hatred

the end to competition

because its all about self domination

A better tomorrow for them

would be a re take of the 1918 world series

a chance to destroy a country

a couple of hearts

maybe break up a family

Peace isnt real

its in the imagination

a theory we play with 

so lets all go down

where heaven meets hell 

explode with the stars

and wither away

To a friend that i hold close to my heart

Never give up hope of a better tomorrow
a better day will come for you
maybe not today
nor will it come tomorrow
but someday you will get over the
monstrous mountain we call life
and you will stand on that mountain
victoriously and raise your arm up high
and scream to the heavens

FUCK YOU !!!

- Jewlie

I love you beef. like no tomorrow. I will be here till the day you turn me in for a pinata. .

ha ha

THIS ONES FOR YOU

"I'm A Fake"

[Spoken:]Small, simple, safe price

Rise the wake and carry me with all of my regrets

This is not a small cut that scabs, and dries, and flakes, and heals

And I am not afraid to die

I'm not afraid to bleed, and fuck, and fight.I want the pain of payment

What's left, but a section of pigmy size cuts

Much like a slew of a thousand unwanted fucks

Would you be my little cut?

Would you be my thousand fucks?

And make mark leaving space for the guilt to be liquid

To fill, and spill over, and under my thoughts

My sad, sorry, selfish cry out to the cutter

I'm cutting trying to picture your black broken heart

Love is not like anything

Especially a fucking knife

Look at me, you can tell

By the way I move and do my hair

Do you think that it's me or it's not me?

I don't even care

I'm alive

I don't smell

I'm the cleanest I have ever been.

I feel big, I feel tall, I feel dry (dry)

[Chorus:]Just look at me, look at me now

I'm a fake [x4]Just look at me, look at me now

I'm a fake [x4]

Do I drink? Do I date?

I've got perfect placement all my ink

Satisfied, in your eyes

I'm the biggest fan I've got right now
I made sure, that I look how I wanted to look

The people around me, the people surround me

I feel big, I feel tall, I feel dry (dry)
[Chorus]

My stomach hurts now, and all tied off in lace

I pray, I beg for anything, to hit me in the face

and this sicknes isn't me, I pray to fall from grace

The last thing I see is feeling

And I'm telling you

I'm a fake [x4]

And I'm telling you I'm...
[Chorus]

All To Entertain You

I am very distubed by the recent news of Britney Spears. I almost feel sorry for her, because she is only human and the media has pushed her to become this monster. I cant believe just a few hours ago police raided her home because she refused to give back HER CHILDREN! those are her children and police raided HER HOUSE?!?! I'm sorry. That is not right, and who ever decided that Brittney is an UNFIT mother needs to shove a donkey up their ass for thinking KFED is any better. This has driven me past my cool. I respect that woman for putting up with it this long. For fucking dealing with alligations AS RIDIC as they are. Its horrible what the media has created for her. I'm suprised she didnt snap earlier. I'm suprised she hasnt killed herself.

Sometimes I thank who ever plays the magic lottery for not choosing me to become one of them "pop princesses" or any form of famous. Its to much, and fuck you those who laugh in her face and some of you are even my friends. I really look down on you now. Its our fault shes like this. You konw that right. What makes her any different then any of us? I remember vividly riding on my dads lap while holding the wheel. . or even just sleeping. . and no one fucking said shit. I remember my mom dropping my sister IN PUBLIC . . TWICE! and no one claimed she was a un fit mother. SHES A FUCKING MOTHER!!! GET OFF HER FUCKING NUTS. I cannot stand what I am seeing these days. People drowning in the lives of celebrities. Its mostly the youth. The sad pathetic youth. Well i hope yer happy. The bitch has cracked. All because she loves two little boys more than anything in the world. Two little boys who will have to grow up thinking their mother is a psyco case.
Now go back to your normal lives.
Your sad pathetic lives in front of the computer Stalking celebrities such as the JONAS BROTHERS.
Go back to your familiesand your social scene.
Go back to all of what you know
all that makes you safe
because just think about it
she cant go back to anything
and its all to entertain your SAD pathetic little souls.
<3 Jewlie

PS: From now on. I refuse to go on any site that contributes the sad pathetic lives you people lead. Call me crazy like her but look at you laughing at the fact a woman has been hospitlized because she went crazy trying to keep her kids. ALL TO ENTERTAIN YOU.

NEW TOMORROW? Happy New Year

Today marks the first day of the rest of 2008. Its going to be a good year, I hope. Some people make new years resoultions, I make new years im going to try to do's.

1. I'm going to take care of myself more.

2 . I'm going to get more imagery tattoos.

3. I'm going to promote WBR a lot harder and be less lazy about it.

4. I'm going to help take S//C to a new level.

5. I'm going to stop living life so fast. Take a breather.

The last one might kill me .

Well I figure that I can at least step it up a notch in the promoting world. ya know.

My first new years song was REBEL YELL which was all sorts of amazing. The first person to talk to me was Danny from New Tomorrow. Which was funny. OH YEA check out myspace.com/newtomorrow their fuckn AMAZING. S//C's new addition to the happy family.

Thats all I got right now. I didnt party last night as usual because I didnt feel like dealing with drunks all night.

SO i stayed home like the looser I am and just chilled.

happy new year.